Deployment

The first. The worst.

But sadly, I've heard it never gets easier.

 

I can't imagine having to go through this every few years.

Luckily, Keeping busy has made the time go by a little faster,

or at least it did this weekend. And I am going to be nothing but busy

in these next few months. Baby number 1 is on the way. Just a few short months away.

 

Until then:

Decorate the nursery.

Prepare the house.

Attempt to train the dogs.

Visit home.. Washington.

Throw a baby shower.

Doctor appointments upon doctor appointments.

Send care packages.

Write letter to my husband and to my dad.

Make sure the bills are paid.

Make sure I have all the items needed for the baby.

All this on top of my regular house wife duties:

Cooking

Cleaning

Laundry

Shopping

 

The lists go on and on.

Not to mention its going to be holiday season while he's gone.

 

I am trying to keep positive.

At least as positive as I can be.

 

The first night was the worst.

Opening the door for the dogs to come inside the house, them running straight pass me to go look for daddy. Even though he spent the past week letting them know he would be gone.

Then seeing all his stuff. Remembering the last hug. The last kiss. The last time he held my hand. The last time we cuddled in bed and talked. Cherishing every moment. Realizing how long it would be until I could do it all again. That sinking feeling you get when it all hits you at once... its unforgettable. And reoccurring..

 

Months without your best friend. The love of your life. Your soul mate. The person you have spent so much time longing for, then when you finally have them, they get ripped away from you.

 

But as awful as this all sounds, I am not trying to make you feel bad for me, or anything like that. I am saying that ALL this 'awful' stuff has a purpose. God has a more divine and great plan than I can imagine. I may not understand why right now, but eventually God will reveal why this is all taking place, and why we can't be together right now. Maybe to be a good testimony to other military wives. Maybe he has a lesson for me in all this. Maybe he has a lesson for Justin in all this. Maybe its just to make us stronger people.

 

Whatever the reason may be, I am trusting in God. Loving my husband. And taking it day by day.

Because well, that's all I can do..

And remembering that God wouldn't put me in any situation I couldn't handle.

And that all things are possible through Him.

When I am weak, He is strong for me. Encouraging me, guiding me, and loving me.

 

Until next time fellow bloggers, and readers.